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#21
07-18-2003, 12:51 PM
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(in a tone of frustration) For answers to these and all of your questions please look back at other posts in the forums. I will probably be hunted down and hung if I were to begin posting again.
Thank you, Me 
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#22
07-18-2003, 02:39 PM
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You want HIPAA Jokes I got them for you. Here we go!
The HIPAA act will be combined with the newly formed Physicians Organized To Manage Uncontrolled Senatorial Spending (POTMUSS). The new act will be refered to as HIPAA-POTMUSS and is expected to be HUGE. HIPAA stands for: Health Industry Paying All Attorneys Highly Intricate Paperwork in Abundant Amounts Health Insurance Pain in the *** Act High Income Potential for Aggressive Attorneys Having Impact Past All Assumptions Its subtitle is: The Trial Lawyers Full Reemployment Act of 1996 ----------------------- HIPAA Puns What is the effect of today's meeting/presentation? HIPAAnosis What will you least likely say after this meeting? HIP-HIPAA-Ray What do you call urgent HIPAA issues? HIPAAcritical What do you call a provider if he/she is found to have violated patient confidentiality? HIPAAcrit What do you call a theory for HIPAA success? HIPAAthesis What do you call the passage of all HIPAA rules? HIPAAthetical situation What does one experience once they've grown cold to HIPAA compliance threats? HIPAAthermia What do you call someone who complains incessantly about HIPAA? HIPAAchondriac What do you say on October 16, 2002? I'm in a HIPAA trouble. What do you call the uphill slope toward HIPAA compliance? HIPAAtenuse What do you call a "shot" of HIPAA humor? HIPAAdermic What do you call someone who thinks HIPAA is sweet? HIPAAglycemic What is the disease you get from too much HIPAA? HIPAAtitis What do you call someone who is delighted with HIPAA? HIPAA-go-lucky What cowboy will star on Saturday morning TV after HIPAA? HIPAAlong Cassidy What do you call someone who is afraid of HIPAA? HIPAAphobic What do you call a boring person who talks in circles about HIPAA? HIPAA Drone What do you call government personnel who write HIPAA rules? HIPAAcrats ----------------------------- HIPAA Theme Song HIPAA-dee-doo-dah, HIPAA-dee-day, My, oh, my, what a stressful day. Plenty of spreadsheets coming my way. HIPAA-dee-doo-dah, HIPAA-dee-day. ----------------------------- A Visit to the ER from St. Nick Twas the night before surgery, and all 'cross the floor The patients were buzzing 'bout the guy in Room Four. His chart was hung on his door with great care To make sure his name was not shown anywhere. The patients were nestled all snug in their beds While telemetry monitors beeped overhead. And I in my gown, with its crack in the back, Had just settled down for my clear liquid snack. When down the hall there arose such a clatter, I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter. I pulled off my leads and flew out the door, With my IV pole dragging behind on the floor. Away to Room Four I hurriedly dashed Unaware of my gown and the nurses I flashed. As I slid to a halt and leaned to peek in I heard the nurse say, "Sir, you mustn't go in!" And what did I see when I looked in Bed A But ole Mr. Claus; on his belly he lay. Covered in gauze and stuck high in the air Oh what a sight, 'twas St. Nick's derriere! He was yelling at Doris, the nurse at his side To be tied to this bed, he just could not abide. He moaned and he bellowed about his ill luck But there was just nothing for it; the old man was stuck. "What happened to Santa?" to Doris I said, "Why's he on his belly in this hospital bed?" With a grin she whispered, "He did something stupid. He injured his butt when he backed into Cupid." But the old man's ears were sharp as tack. He heard what she said there behind his back. "You had no right to speak, and that is a fact! Don't you know about HIPAA, the privacy act?" "You're out of compliance, Doris, my dear. You had no right to tell him 'bout my injured rear! I'll sue you for breach, and this hospital, too! You won't have a job when I'm through with you!" "When I check my list and then check it twice, You'll be in the column labeled 'Not Nice.' The HIPAA patrol will likewise drop by To find out why you, Doris, did not comply!" "They'll want to know why you opened your yap, A big, hefty fine on your butt they will slap. And from me every Christmas you will now see Nothing but switches and coal 'neath your tree." Merry Christmas and HIPAA New Year! ---------------------------------------- HIPAA HUSH To the tune of "There's a Kind of Hush" originally recorded by Herman's Hermits (also recorded by the Carpenters) There's a kind of hush All over the ward tonight All over the ward You can hear the sound of HIPAA coming You know what I mean Just the nurse and doc And no PHI in sight There's no PHI and we're feeling good Protecting your rights We store charts very carefully Speak softer now so you won't need to complain We're going insane! The many forms that you complete Seem to pile up at our FPO's feet For ever and ever! There's a kind of hush All over the ward tonight All over the ward We are stressing out protecting your rights!
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D. Hager Paramedic I.A.C.O.J. EMS Bureau Fraternal Order of Paramedics-Co-Vice Chair People don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care!
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#23
07-18-2003, 02:46 PM
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I wonder if a Doctor would see a patient if the nurse refused to show their chart:
"Doctor." "Yes?" "There's a patient in room D ready to see you." "Okay, I need to see their chart." "I can't let you see that." "What?" "That would be a violation of their privacy." "Oh, for crying... okay, what are they here for?" "Can't tell you that either. Or their vitals." "Just what am I supposed to work with here?" "Look, are you a doctor, or aren't you? Just go in and do your job." "It's not that simple. To even decide if I need to see the patient, much less begin with differential analysis, I need a basic set of facts. While I can eventually find out what's going on, knowing in advance saves my time and the patient's money." "I can't help you there. The patient has a right to privacy right up until the last microsecond before you walk in the door." "Do they waive their rights once I see them?" "Huh?" "Once I see them, know their name, figure out their symptoms in spite of your efforts... do they still have a right to privacy?" "Of course. You have an ethical obligation to confidentiality." "Are my ethics limited to the examination room?" "Again... huh?" "Is there anything in the AMA Code of Ethics* which says that I am not bound to keep my patients' confidences, say, while I am talking to you?" "No." "Then why, for the sake of Pete, can't I see the records?" "Rules are rules." "Argh!"
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D. Hager Paramedic I.A.C.O.J. EMS Bureau Fraternal Order of Paramedics-Co-Vice Chair People don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care!
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#24
07-18-2003, 03:28 PM
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__________________
D. Hager Paramedic I.A.C.O.J. EMS Bureau Fraternal Order of Paramedics-Co-Vice Chair People don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care!
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#25
07-19-2003, 05:33 AM
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Priceless...
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Linear Mode
